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He is the only man I ever met with a seersucker face.

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Faces
Funny
Ever
Men
Introduction
Mets
Humor
Face

More quotes by Henny Youngman

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That was the first time I saw a horse start from a kneeling position!
Henny Youngman
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I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, There is water in the carburetor. I said, Where's the car? She said, In the lake.
Henny Youngman
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I played a lot of tough clubs in my time. Once a guy in one of those clubs wanted to bet me $10 that I was dead. I was afraid to bet.
Henny Youngman
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A Polish guy locked his keys in the car. It took an hour to get his wife out.
Henny Youngman
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My doctor grabbed me by the wallet and said,'Cough'
Henny Youngman
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A woman says to a man, I haven't seen you around here. Yes, I just got out of jail for killing my wife. So you're single!
Henny Youngman
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Everytime I ask what time it is, I get a different answer.
Henny Youngman
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My room is so small, the mice are hunchbacked.
Henny Youngman
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I bet on a horse at ten-to-one. It didn't come in until half-past five.
Henny Youngman
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Zsa Zsa Gabor is an expert housekeeper. Every time she gets divorced, she keeps the house.
Henny Youngman
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A bomb fell on Italy. It slid off!
Henny Youngman
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There was a girl knocking on my hotel room door all night! Finally, I let her out.
Henny Youngman
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She must have Egyptian blood. Every time I try to kiss her she says, Tut, Tut!
Henny Youngman
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Last night I ordered a whole meal in French. Even the waiter was amazed - it was a Chinese restaurant!
Henny Youngman
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A tough guy told me, I'll bet you $10 you're dead. I was afraid to bet him.
Henny Youngman
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The Doctor says, You'll live to be 60! I AM 60! See, what did I tell you?
Henny Youngman
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I'd commit suicide, if I could do it without killing myself.
Henny Youngman
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If a joke is too hard to visualize, I tell the young comics, then what the hell good is it?
Henny Youngman
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The room is so small, when I put the key in, I broke the window!
Henny Youngman
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College: A fountain of knowledge where all go to drink.
Henny Youngman