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The room is so small, when I put the key in, I broke the window!

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Window
Room
Humor
Rooms
Small
Funny
Hotel
Broke
Keys

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A Polish man had a bandage on each ear. What happened? I was ironing, and the phone rang! What about the other ear? Had to call the doctor!
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My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.
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I don't mind when my horse is left at the post. I don't mind when my horse comes up to me in the stands and asks, Which way do I go? But when the horse I bet on is at the $2 window betting on another horse in the same race...
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Anybody who thinks talk is cheap has never argued with a traffic cop.
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When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.
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Are you Polish? Okay, I'll talk slower.
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The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once... You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
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How do Polish people spell farm? E-I-E-I-O
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The other day I broke 70. That's a lot of clubs.
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A woman was taking a shower. There is a knock on the door. Who is it? Blind man! The woman opens the door. Where do you want these blinds, lady?
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Don't move! I want to forget you just the way you are.
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A baby-sitter is a teenager who gets two dollars an hour to eat five dollars' worth of your food.
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My brother then bought 1000 Japanese cameras. They all go, Crick.
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Most marriage failures are caused by failures marrying.
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Why are you hitting me, there is nobody behind us!
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I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, There is water in the carburetor. I said, Where's the car? She said, In the lake.
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All men are not homeless, but some men are home less than others.
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Let's get up here before we get killed!
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He is the only man I ever met with a seersucker face.
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I've kissed so many women I can do it with my eyes closed.
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