Quote

The Doctor says, You'll live to be 60! I AM 60! See, what did I tell you?

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Tell
Live
Doctor
Doctors
Humor
Says
Funny

More quotes by Henny Youngman

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A bomb fell on Italy. It slid off!
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The hotel I'm in has a lovely closet. A nail.
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Have you noticed that families on TV never watch television?
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Everytime I ask what time it is, I get a different answer.
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The room is so small, when I put the key in, I broke the window!
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When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
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I'll never forget my first words in the theatre. Peanuts. Popcorn.
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A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says You've been brought here for drinking. The drunk says Okay, let's get started.
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Two Polish men at Halloween with burned faces. What happened? They were bobbing for french fries.
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We were married for better or worse. I couldn't have done better, and she couldn't have done worse.
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Two Santa Clauses on the corner. How can you tell the Polish one? The one with the Easter basket.
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The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once... You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
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I'm paid to make an idiot out of myself. Why do you do it for free?
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Last night I ordered a whole meal in French. Even the waiter was amazed - it was a Chinese restaurant!
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Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
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This man is frank and earnest with women. In Fresno, he's Frank and in Chicago he's Ernest.
Henny Youngman
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Doctor says to a man, You're pregnant! The man says, How does a man get pregnant? The doctor says, The usual way - a little wine, a little dinner....
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The doctor says to the patient, Take your clothes off and stick your tongue out the window. What will that do asks the patient. The doctor says I'm mad at my neighbor!.
Henny Youngman
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Don't move! I want to forget you just the way you are.
Henny Youngman
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A motel is where you give up good dollars for bad quarters.
Henny Youngman