Quote

The Doctor says, You'll live to be 60! I AM 60! See, what did I tell you?

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Says
Funny
Tell
Live
Doctor
Doctors
Humor

More quotes by Henny Youngman

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My wife is a light eater. As soon as it's light, she starts to eat.
Henny Youngman
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A baby-sitter is a teenager who gets two dollars an hour to eat five dollars' worth of your food.
Henny Youngman
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On dancing on pointe: Why don't they just get taller girls?
Henny Youngman
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I wish my brother would learn a trade, so I would know what kind of work he's out of.
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Have you noticed that families on TV never watch television?
Henny Youngman
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Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to.
Henny Youngman
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All men are not homeless, but some men are home less than others.
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I live about four muggings from Central Park.
Henny Youngman
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The horse I bet on was so slow, the jockey kept a diary of the trip.
Henny Youngman
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I own a hundred and fifty books, but I have no bookcase. Nobody will lend me a bookcase.
Henny Youngman
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A Polish man bought a zebra for a pet. What does he call the zebra? Spot!
Henny Youngman
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We were married for better or worse. I couldn't have done better, and she couldn't have done worse.
Henny Youngman
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Where did you get your haircut, the pet shop?
Henny Youngman
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She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, Am I too late for the garbage? No, jump in!
Henny Youngman
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The doctor says to the patient, Take your clothes off and stick your tongue out the window. What will that do asks the patient. The doctor says I'm mad at my neighbor!.
Henny Youngman
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Are you Polish? Okay, I'll talk slower.
Henny Youngman
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A bomb fell on Italy. It slid off!
Henny Youngman
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Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
Henny Youngman
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Everytime I ask what time it is, I get a different answer.
Henny Youngman
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My history teacher was so old, he taught from memory.
Henny Youngman