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Don't move! I want to forget you just the way you are.

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Moving
Way
Move
Forget

More quotes by Henny Youngman

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A baby-sitter is a teenager who gets two dollars an hour to eat five dollars' worth of your food.
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My wife and I went back to the hotel where we spent our wedding night. Only this time, I stayed in the bathroom and cried.
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My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.
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Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
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Have I got a mother-in-law. She's so neat she puts paper under the cuckoo clock.
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I wish my brother would learn a trade, so I would know what kind of work he's out of.
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Let's get up here before we get killed!
Henny Youngman
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I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.
Henny Youngman
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I own a hundred and fifty books, but I have no bookcase. Nobody will lend me a bookcase.
Henny Youngman
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You have the Midas touch. Everything you touch turns to a muffler.
Henny Youngman
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Is that your hat or are you wearing a cabana?
Henny Youngman
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Why do Jewish divorces cost so much? They're worth it.
Henny Youngman
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My wife has a black belt in shopping.
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My wife is a light eater. As soon as it's light, she starts to eat.
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My wife and I went to a hotel where we got a waterbed. My wife called it the Dead Sea.
Henny Youngman
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This man is frank and earnest with women. In Fresno, he's Frank and in Chicago he's Ernest.
Henny Youngman
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If I had blood, I'd blush.
Henny Youngman
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My wife has a keen sense of humor. The more I humor her, the better.
Henny Youngman
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I know a man in Ft. Worth with 100,000 head of cattle. No bodies, just heads.
Henny Youngman
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A Polish terrorist was sent to blow up a car. He burned his mouth on the exhaust pipe!
Henny Youngman