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All men are not homeless, but some men are home less than others.

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Others
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Homeless
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More quotes by Henny Youngman

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My room is so small, the mice are hunchbacked.
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The Doctor says, You'll live to be 60! I AM 60! See, what did I tell you?
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Americans are getting stronger. Twenty years ago, it took two people to carry ten dollars' worth of groceries. Today, a five-year-old can do it.
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I know what I'm giving up for Lent: my New Year's resolutions.
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I'd commit suicide, if I could do it without killing myself.
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My wife drives the wrong way on a one way street. The cop pulled her over and asked, Where are you going? My wife said, I must be late, everyone is all coming back!
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I'll tell you how to beat the gambling in Las Vegas. When you get off the airplane, walk right into the propeller.
Henny Youngman
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I'm paid to make an idiot out of myself. Why do you do it for free?
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My brother then bought 1000 Japanese cameras. They all go, Crick.
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I call my lawyer and say, 'Can I ask you two questions?' He says, 'What's the second question?'
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There were three kids in my family. One of each sex.
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A woman says to a man, I haven't seen you around here. Yes, I just got out of jail for killing my wife. So you're single!
Henny Youngman
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Have you noticed that families on TV never watch television?
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My history teacher was so old, he taught from memory.
Henny Youngman
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Are you Polish? Okay, I'll talk slower.
Henny Youngman
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He is the only man I ever met with a seersucker face.
Henny Youngman
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I'll never forget my first words in the theatre. Peanuts. Popcorn.
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A Jewish man pulls up to the curb and asks the policeman, Can I park here? No says the cop. What about all these other cars? They didn't ask!
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What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money.
Henny Youngman
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Nurse: Doctor, the man you just gave a clean bill of health to dropped dead right as he was leaving the office. Doctor: Turn him around, make it look like he was walking in.
Henny Youngman