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All men are not homeless, but some men are home less than others.

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Others
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Homeless
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More quotes by Henny Youngman

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A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says You've been brought here for drinking. The drunk says Okay, let's get started.
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A bomb fell on Italy. It slid off!
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Most marriage failures are caused by failures marrying.
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I live about four muggings from Central Park.
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I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she'll kill me.
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The doctor says to the patient, Take your clothes off and stick your tongue out the window. What will that do asks the patient. The doctor says I'm mad at my neighbor!.
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The hotel I'm in has a lovely closet. A nail.
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This is an elegant hotel! Room service has an unlisted number.
Henny Youngman
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On dancing on pointe: Why don't they just get taller girls?
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My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.
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There was a girl knocking on my hotel room door all night! Finally, I let her out.
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Have I got a mother-in-law. She's so neat she puts paper under the cuckoo clock.
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The Doctor called Mrs. Cohen saying, Mrs. Cohen, your check came back. Mrs. Cohen answered, So did my arthritis!
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My room is so small, the mice are hunchbacked.
Henny Youngman
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The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once... You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
Henny Youngman
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Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
Henny Youngman
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A tough guy told me, I'll bet you $10 you're dead. I was afraid to bet him.
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I have terrible luck. Last week my chauffeur ran off without my wife.
Henny Youngman
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Let's get up here before we get killed!
Henny Youngman
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While playing golf today, I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
Henny Youngman