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Anybody who thinks talk is cheap has never argued with a traffic cop.
Henny Youngman
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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Thinking
Cop
Cheap
Traffic
Thinks
Communication
Anybody
Talk
Never
Argued
More quotes by Henny Youngman
Let's get up here before we get killed!
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A Polish man had his vasectomy done at Sears. Now when he makes love, the garage door goes up.
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Have you noticed that families on TV never watch television?
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A bomb fell on Italy. It slid off!
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I don't believe in reincarnation, but what were you when you were alive?
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The Doctor called Mrs. Cohen saying, Mrs. Cohen, your check came back. Mrs. Cohen answered, So did my arthritis!
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When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.
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Is that your hat or are you wearing a cabana?
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I thought talk was cheap until I saw our telephone bill.
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A Polish man had a bandage on each ear. What happened? I was ironing, and the phone rang! What about the other ear? Had to call the doctor!
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Now, the band that inspired that great saying, Stop The Music!!
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I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.
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Don't move! I want to forget you just the way you are.
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I live about four muggings from Central Park.
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I have a car that I call Flattery because it gets me nowhere.
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A Polish terrorist was sent to blow up a car. He burned his mouth on the exhaust pipe!
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You have the Midas touch. Everything you touch turns to a muffler.
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I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays.
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I wish my brother would learn a trade, so I would know what kind of work he's out of.
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A doctor has a stethoscope up to a man's chest. The man asks, Doc, how do I stand? The doctor says, That's what puzzles me!
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