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The doctor says to the patient, Take your clothes off and stick your tongue out the window. What will that do asks the patient. The doctor says I'm mad at my neighbor!.
Henny Youngman
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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Take
Doctors
Patient
Window
Doctor
Clothes
Stick
Humor
Mad
Says
Neighbor
Asks
Sticks
Funny
Tongue
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She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, Am I too late for the garbage? No, jump in!
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I'm paid to make an idiot out of myself. Why do you do it for free?
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I played a lot of tough clubs in my time. Once a guy in one of those clubs wanted to bet me $10 that I was dead. I was afraid to bet.
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The horse I bet on was so slow, the jockey kept a diary of the trip.
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When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.
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Zsa Zsa Gabor is an expert housekeeper. Every time she gets divorced, she keeps the house.
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A Polish guy locked his keys in the car. It took an hour to get his wife out.
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I told my mother-in-law my house is your house. So she sold it.
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My wife and I went back to the hotel where we spent our wedding night. Only this time, I stayed in the bathroom and cried.
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Is that your hat or are you wearing a cabana?
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If at first you don't succeed... so much for skydiving.
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You have the Midas touch. Everything you touch turns to a muffler.
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