Quote

On dancing on pointe: Why don't they just get taller girls?

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Pointe
Tiptoes
Taller
Ballet
Dancing
Girls
Girl

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I'm paid to make an idiot out of myself. Why do you do it for free?
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My doctor grabbed me by the wallet and said,'Cough'
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Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport.
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Zsa Zsa Gabor is an expert housekeeper. Every time she gets divorced, she keeps the house.
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There were three kids in my family. One of each sex.
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I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays.
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Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.
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While playing golf today, I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
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In elementary school, many a true word is spoken in guess.
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I was playing golf. I swung, missed the ball, and got a big chunk of dirt. I swung again, missed the ball, and got another big chunk of dirt. Just then, 2 ants climbed on the ball saying, Let's get up here before we get killed!
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My brother then bought 1000 Japanese cameras. They all go, Crick.
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I've been married for 49 years. Where have I failed?
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Why do Jewish divorces cost so much? They're worth it.
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What is a home without children? Quiet.
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Most girls are attracted to the simple things in life. Like men.
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Psychiatrists say that 1 of 4 people are mentally ill. Check 3 friends. If they are okay, you're it.
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A baby-sitter is a teenager who gets two dollars an hour to eat five dollars' worth of your food.
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Have I got a mother-in-law. She's so neat she puts paper under the cuckoo clock.
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