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My doctor grabbed me by the wallet and said,'Cough'
Henny Youngman
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TAGS & TOPICS
Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Grabbed
Cynical
Doctor
Doctors
Humor
Funny
Cough
Wallet
Wallets
More quotes by Henny Youngman
All men are not homeless, but some men are home less than others.
Henny Youngman
The hotel I'm in has a lovely closet. A nail.
Henny Youngman
A Jewish man pulls up to the curb and asks the policeman, Can I park here? No says the cop. What about all these other cars? They didn't ask!
Henny Youngman
I'll tell you how to beat the gambling in Las Vegas. When you get off the airplane, walk right into the propeller.
Henny Youngman
The more I think of you, the less I think of you.
Henny Youngman
This is an elegant hotel! Room service has an unlisted number.
Henny Youngman
Why are you hitting me, there is nobody behind us!
Henny Youngman
I'm offended by political jokes. Too often they get elected.
Henny Youngman
A Polish man bought a zebra for a pet. What does he call the zebra? Spot!
Henny Youngman
What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money.
Henny Youngman
A bomb fell on Italy. It slid off!
Henny Youngman
Where did you get your haircut, the pet shop?
Henny Youngman
Now, the band that inspired that great saying, Stop The Music!!
Henny Youngman
Don't move! I want to forget you just the way you are.
Henny Youngman
Doctor says to a man, You're pregnant! The man says, How does a man get pregnant? The doctor says, The usual way - a little wine, a little dinner....
Henny Youngman
I know a man in Ft. Worth with 100,000 head of cattle. No bodies, just heads.
Henny Youngman
A woman says to a man, I haven't seen you around here. Yes, I just got out of jail for killing my wife. So you're single!
Henny Youngman
She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, Am I too late for the garbage? No, jump in!
Henny Youngman
I have a lovely room and bath in the hotel. It's a little inconvenient, they're in two separate buildings!
Henny Youngman
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
Henny Youngman
