Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
In elementary school, many a true word is spoken in guess.
Henny Youngman
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Teaching
Education
Word
True
School
Sassy
Many
Elementary
Spoken
Guess
More quotes by Henny Youngman
Why are you hitting me, there is nobody behind us!
Henny Youngman
While playing golf today, I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
Henny Youngman
A woman says to a man, I haven't seen you around here. Yes, I just got out of jail for killing my wife. So you're single!
Henny Youngman
I thought talk was cheap until I saw our telephone bill.
Henny Youngman
A doctor has a stethoscope up to a man's chest. The man asks, Doc, how do I stand? The doctor says, That's what puzzles me!
Henny Youngman
Now, the band that inspired that great saying, Stop The Music!!
Henny Youngman
He had a defect, which to a comic might be fatal. He wasn't funny.
Henny Youngman
Another drunk goes up to a parking meter, puts in a quarter, the dial goes to 60. The drunk says, Huh. I lost 100 pounds!
Henny Youngman
The Doctor called Mrs. Cohen saying, Mrs. Cohen, your check came back. Mrs. Cohen answered, So did my arthritis!
Henny Youngman
When I go to a restaurant I always ask the manager, Give me a table near a waiter.
Henny Youngman
I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards.
Henny Youngman
What is a home without children? Quiet.
Henny Youngman
Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
Henny Youngman
Psychiatrists say that 1 of 4 people are mentally ill. Check 3 friends. If they are okay, you're it.
Henny Youngman
Doctor, I have a ringing in my ears. Don't answer!
Henny Youngman
I've been married for 49 years. Where have I failed?
Henny Youngman
I have terrible luck. Last week my chauffeur ran off without my wife.
Henny Youngman
Are you Polish? Okay, I'll talk slower.
Henny Youngman
My wife and I went back to the hotel where we spent our wedding night. Only this time, I stayed in the bathroom and cried.
Henny Youngman
The Doctor says, You'll live to be 60! I AM 60! See, what did I tell you?
Henny Youngman
