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This is an elegant hotel! Room service has an unlisted number.

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Service
Number
Room
Humor
Rooms
Numbers
Hospitality
Funny
Elegant
Hotel

More quotes by Henny Youngman

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I wish my brother would learn a trade, so I would know what kind of work he's out of.
Henny Youngman
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Don't move! I want to forget you just the way you are.
Henny Youngman
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He is the only man I ever met with a seersucker face.
Henny Youngman
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Psychiatrists say that 1 of 4 people are mentally ill. Check 3 friends. If they are okay, you're it.
Henny Youngman
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I told my mother-in-law my house is your house. So she sold it.
Henny Youngman
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There was a girl knocking on my hotel room door all night! Finally, I let her out.
Henny Youngman
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I live about four muggings from Central Park.
Henny Youngman
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I don't believe in reincarnation, but what were you when you were alive?
Henny Youngman
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I own a hundred and fifty books, but I have no bookcase. Nobody will lend me a bookcase.
Henny Youngman
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I'm offended by political jokes. Too often they get elected.
Henny Youngman
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I know a man who is a diamond cutter. He mows the lawn at Yankee Stadium.
Henny Youngman
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You have the Midas touch. Everything you touch turns to a muffler.
Henny Youngman
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My wife and I went to a hotel where we got a waterbed. My wife called it the Dead Sea.
Henny Youngman
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My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.
Henny Youngman
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A doctor says to a man, You want to improve your love life? You need to get some exercise. Run ten miles a day. Two weeks later, the man called the doctor. The doctor says, How is your love life since you have been running? I don't know, I'm 140 miles away!
Henny Youngman
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How do Polish people spell farm? E-I-E-I-O
Henny Youngman
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Have I got a mother-in-law. She's so neat she puts paper under the cuckoo clock.
Henny Youngman
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The more I think of you, the less I think of you.
Henny Youngman
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A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says You've been brought here for drinking. The drunk says Okay, let's get started.
Henny Youngman
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In elementary school, many a true word is spoken in guess.
Henny Youngman