Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
That was the first time I saw a horse start from a kneeling position!
Henny Youngman
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
First
Kneeling
Time
Horse
Saws
Humor
Position
Start
Funny
Firsts
More quotes by Henny Youngman
This man is frank and earnest with women. In Fresno, he's Frank and in Chicago he's Ernest.
Henny Youngman
I went to the bank and reviewed my savings, I found out I have all the money I'll ever need. If I die tomorrow.
Henny Youngman
A doctor has a stethoscope up to a man's chest. The man asks, Doc, how do I stand? The doctor says, That's what puzzles me!
Henny Youngman
There was a girl knocking on my hotel room door all night! Finally, I let her out.
Henny Youngman
I know what I'm giving up for Lent: my New Year's resolutions.
Henny Youngman
You have the Midas touch. Everything you touch turns to a muffler.
Henny Youngman
Now, the band that inspired that great saying, Stop The Music!!
Henny Youngman
The horse I bet on was so slow, the jockey kept a diary of the trip.
Henny Youngman
On dancing on pointe: Why don't they just get taller girls?
Henny Youngman
Another drunk goes up to a parking meter, puts in a quarter, the dial goes to 60. The drunk says, Huh. I lost 100 pounds!
Henny Youngman
A bomb fell on Italy. It slid off!
Henny Youngman
My room is so small, the mice are hunchbacked.
Henny Youngman
The other day I broke 70. That's a lot of clubs.
Henny Youngman
There were three kids in my family. One of each sex.
Henny Youngman
I'm offended by political jokes. Too often they get elected.
Henny Youngman
I've been married for 49 years. Where have I failed?
Henny Youngman
She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, Am I too late for the garbage? No, jump in!
Henny Youngman
Anybody who thinks talk is cheap has never argued with a traffic cop.
Henny Youngman
A tough guy told me, I'll bet you $10 you're dead. I was afraid to bet him.
Henny Youngman
If I had blood, I'd blush.
Henny Youngman
