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I know a man who doesn't pay to have his trash taken out. How does he get rid of his trash? He gift wraps it, and puts in into an unlocked car.

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Doesn
Wraps
Doe
Trash
Men
Puts
Car
Gift
Pay
Comedy
Taken
Unlocked

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I wish my brother would learn a trade, so I would know what kind of work he's out of.
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How do Polish people spell farm? E-I-E-I-O
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Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
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If I had blood, I'd blush.
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A Polish terrorist was sent to blow up a car. He burned his mouth on the exhaust pipe!
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My brother then opened a tall man's shop in Tokyo.
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My wife has a keen sense of humor. The more I humor her, the better.
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My wife drives the wrong way on a one way street. The cop pulled her over and asked, Where are you going? My wife said, I must be late, everyone is all coming back!
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Two Santa Clauses on the corner. How can you tell the Polish one? The one with the Easter basket.
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He had a defect, which to a comic might be fatal. He wasn't funny.
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A Polish guy locked his keys in the car. It took an hour to get his wife out.
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Doctor, I have a ringing in my ears. Don't answer!
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Now, the band that inspired that great saying, Stop The Music!!
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I don't mind when my horse is left at the post. I don't mind when my horse comes up to me in the stands and asks, Which way do I go? But when the horse I bet on is at the $2 window betting on another horse in the same race...
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Americans are getting stronger. Twenty years ago, it took two people to carry ten dollars' worth of groceries. Today, a five-year-old can do it.
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My room is so small, the mice are hunchbacked.
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That was the first time I saw a horse start from a kneeling position!
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Most girls are attracted to the simple things in life. Like men.
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I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays.
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Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to.
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