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A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student.
Henny Youngman
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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Taught
Poor
Self
Student
Men
Worse
Usually
Students
Teaching
Teacher
More quotes by Henny Youngman
A Polish guy locked his keys in the car. It took an hour to get his wife out.
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Is that your hat or are you wearing a cabana?
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Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to.
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We were married for better or worse. I couldn't have done better, and she couldn't have done worse.
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If you had your life to live over again, do it overseas.
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I know what I'm giving up for Lent: my New Year's resolutions.
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Now, the band that inspired that great saying, Stop The Music!!
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I call my lawyer and say, 'Can I ask you two questions?' He says, 'What's the second question?'
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On dancing on pointe: Why don't they just get taller girls?
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Most marriage failures are caused by failures marrying.
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A woman says to a man, I haven't seen you around here. Yes, I just got out of jail for killing my wife. So you're single!
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I have a lovely room and bath in the hotel. It's a little inconvenient, they're in two separate buildings!
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My best friend ran away with my wife, and let me tell you, I miss him.
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My wife and I went to a hotel where we got a waterbed. My wife called it the Dead Sea.
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I'm offended by political jokes. Too often they get elected.
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I thought talk was cheap until I saw our telephone bill.
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I played a lot of tough clubs in my time. Once a guy in one of those clubs wanted to bet me $10 that I was dead. I was afraid to bet.
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We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
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I live about four muggings from Central Park.
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What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money.
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