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This man is frank and earnest with women. In Fresno, he's Frank and in Chicago he's Ernest.
Henny Youngman
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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Men
Introduction
Earnest
Frank
Chicago
Humor
Comedy
Funny
Women
Ernest
More quotes by Henny Youngman
My brother then opened a tall man's shop in Tokyo.
Henny Youngman
Don't move! I want to forget you just the way you are.
Henny Youngman
I don't mind when my horse is left at the post. I don't mind when my horse comes up to me in the stands and asks, Which way do I go? But when the horse I bet on is at the $2 window betting on another horse in the same race...
Henny Youngman
Anybody who thinks talk is cheap has never argued with a traffic cop.
Henny Youngman
My wife is a light eater. As soon as it's light, she starts to eat.
Henny Youngman
I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she'll kill me.
Henny Youngman
There was a girl knocking on my hotel room door all night! Finally, I let her out.
Henny Youngman
If at first you don't succeed... so much for skydiving.
Henny Youngman
Last night I ordered a whole meal in French. Even the waiter was amazed - it was a Chinese restaurant!
Henny Youngman
My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.
Henny Youngman
I've been married for 49 years. Where have I failed?
Henny Youngman
You have a ready wit. Tell me when it's ready.
Henny Youngman
He had a defect, which to a comic might be fatal. He wasn't funny.
Henny Youngman
She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, Am I too late for the garbage? No, jump in!
Henny Youngman
My best friend ran away with my wife, and let me tell you, I miss him.
Henny Youngman
I know a man who is a diamond cutter. He mows the lawn at Yankee Stadium.
Henny Youngman
In elementary school, many a true word is spoken in guess.
Henny Youngman
My history teacher was so old, he taught from memory.
Henny Youngman
While playing golf today, I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
Henny Youngman
I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards.
Henny Youngman
