Quote

Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.

Henny Youngman

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Little
Week
Restaurants
Tuesdays
Take
Asks
Soft
Fridays
Long
Secret
Witty
Candlelight
Time
Times
Dinner
Tuesday
People
Funny
Dancing
Anniversary
Two
Marriage
Restaurant
Littles
Relationship
Friday
Music
Goes
Dating

More quotes by Henny Youngman

Image
Have you noticed that families on TV never watch television?
Henny Youngman
Image
If you had your life to live over again, do it overseas.
Henny Youngman
Image
My history teacher was so old, he taught from memory.
Henny Youngman
Image
Psychiatrists say that 1 of 4 people are mentally ill. Check 3 friends. If they are okay, you're it.
Henny Youngman
Image
My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.
Henny Youngman
Image
A guy says, I'm so old that I forgot how old I am. An old woman says, I'll tell you how old you are. Take off your clothes and bend over. The man does this. The woman says, You're seventy four. The man says, How can you tell? The woman says, You told me yesterday.
Henny Youngman
Image
A Polish man had a bandage on each ear. What happened? I was ironing, and the phone rang! What about the other ear? Had to call the doctor!
Henny Youngman
Image
I wish my brother would learn a trade, so I would know what kind of work he's out of.
Henny Youngman
Image
Zsa Zsa Gabor is an expert housekeeper. Every time she gets divorced, she keeps the house.
Henny Youngman
Image
I'll never forget my first words in the theatre. Peanuts. Popcorn.
Henny Youngman
Image
The more I think of you, the less I think of you.
Henny Youngman
Image
We were married for better or worse. I couldn't have done better, and she couldn't have done worse.
Henny Youngman
Image
She must have Egyptian blood. Every time I try to kiss her she says, Tut, Tut!
Henny Youngman
Image
I have a car that I call Flattery because it gets me nowhere.
Henny Youngman
Image
My wife and I went to a hotel where we got a waterbed. My wife called it the Dead Sea.
Henny Youngman
Image
Most girls are attracted to the simple things in life. Like men.
Henny Youngman
Image
Why are you hitting me, there is nobody behind us!
Henny Youngman
Image
The hotel I'm in has a lovely closet. A nail.
Henny Youngman
Image
Everytime I ask what time it is, I get a different answer.
Henny Youngman
Image
Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
Henny Youngman