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Estimated from a wife's experience, the average man spends fully one-quarter of his life in looking for his shoes.
Helen Rowland
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Helen Rowland
Age: 74 †
Born: 1875
Born: January 1
Died: 1950
Died: January 1
Humorist
Journalist
Average
Wife
Looking
Estimated
Experience
Spends
Men
Quarter
Life
Quarters
Fully
Shoes
More quotes by Helen Rowland
A man snatches the first kiss, pleads for the second, demands the third, takes the fourth, accepts the fifth - and endures all the rest.
Helen Rowland
A fool and her money are soon courted.
Helen Rowland
Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near.
Helen Rowland
Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.
Helen Rowland
In love, somehow, a man's heart is always either exceeding the speed limit, or getting parked in the wrong place.
Helen Rowland
Marriage is a bargain, and somebody has to get the worst end of the bargain.
Helen Rowland
A woman flees from temptation, but a man just crawls away from it in the cheerful hope that it may overtake him.
Helen Rowland
Love is a matter of give and take -- marriage, a matter of misgive and mistake.
Helen Rowland
Home is any four walls that enclose the right person.
Helen Rowland
To a man, marriage means giving up four out of five of the chiffonier drawers to a woman, giving up four out of five of her opinions.
Helen Rowland
To make a man perfectly happy tell him he works too hard, that he spends too much money, that he is misunderstood or that he is different none of this is necessarily complimentary, but it will flatter him infinitely more than merely telling him that he is brilliant, or noble, or wise, or good.
Helen Rowland
A man's desire for a son is usually nothing but the wish to duplicate himself in order that such a remarkable pattern may not be lost to the world.
Helen Rowland
Going through life without love is like going through a good dinner without an appetite -- everything seems so flat and tasteless.
Helen Rowland
The feminine vanity-case is the graveyard of masculine illusions.
Helen Rowland
At twenty, a man feels awfully aged and blasé at thirty, almost senile at forty, not so old and at fifty, positively skittish.
Helen Rowland
To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
Helen Rowland
Marriage is the only thing that affords a woman the pleasure of company and the perfect sensation of solitude at the same time.
Helen Rowland
No girl who is going to marry need bother to win a college degree she just naturally becomes a Master of Arts and a Doctor of Philosophy after catering to an ordinary man for a few years.
Helen Rowland
A Bachelor of Arts is one who makes love to a lot of women, and yet has the art to remain a bachelor.
Helen Rowland
A man's ideal woman is the one he couldn't get.
Helen Rowland