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Estimated from a wife's experience, the average man spends fully one-quarter of his life in looking for his shoes.

Helen Rowland

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Helen Rowland
Age: 74 †
Born: 1875
Born: January 1
Died: 1950
Died: January 1
Humorist
Journalist
Life
Quarters
Fully
Shoes
Average
Wife
Looking
Estimated
Experience
Spends
Men
Quarter

More quotes by Helen Rowland

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Home is any four walls that enclose the right person.
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Better a lively old epigram than a deadly new one.
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Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.
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Alas, why will a man spend months trying to hand over his liberty to a woman--and the rest of his life trying to get it back again?
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A fool and her money are soon courted.
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A woman flees from temptation, but a man just crawls away from it in the cheerful hope that it may overtake him.
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Nobody is quite so blase and sophisticated as a boy of nineteen who is just recovering from a baby grand passion
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A wise woman puts a grain of sugar into everything she says to a man, and takes a grain of salt with everything he says to her.
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Some women blush when they are kissed, some call for the police, some swear, some bite. But the worst are those who laugh.
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Before marriage, when a woman speaks to a man in an undertone, he calls it cooing after marriage, he calls it nagging.
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A good woman inspires a man, a brilliant woman interests him, a beautiful woman fascinates him, but a sympathetic woman gets him.
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Falling in love consists merely in uncorking the imagination and bottling the common sense.
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Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.
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A bachelor has to have an inspiration for making love to a woman--a married man needs only an excuse.
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Love: woman's eternal spring and man's eternal fall.
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At twenty, a man feels awfully aged and blasé at thirty, almost senile at forty, not so old and at fifty, positively skittish.
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A man never knows how to say goodbye a woman never knows when to say it.
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To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
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Eve had one advantage over all the rest of her sex. In his wildest moments of rage Adam never could accuse her of being 'just like her mother!
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A man falls in love through his eyes, a woman through her imagination, and then they both speak of it as an affair of 'the heart.
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