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Some women blush when they are kissed, some call for the police, some swear, some bite. But the worst are those who laugh.

Helen Rowland

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Helen Rowland
Age: 74 †
Born: 1875
Born: January 1
Died: 1950
Died: January 1
Humorist
Journalist
Laughing
Kissed
Worst
Bite
Call
Bites
Women
Swear
Kissing
Police
Laughter
Laugh
Blush

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A fool and her money are soon courted.
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There are many times where a woman would gladly drop her husband if she did not feel morally certain that some other woman would come right along and pick him up.
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Going through life without love is like going through a good dinner without an appetite -- everything seems so flat and tasteless.
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After marriage, a woman's sight becomes so keen that she can see right through her husband without looking at him, and a man's so dull that he can look right through his wife without seeing her.
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Marriage is a bargain, and somebody has to get the worst end of the bargain.
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A bachelor gets tangled up with a lot of women in order to avoid getting tied up to one.
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A man falls in love through his eyes, a woman through her imagination, and then they both speak of it as an affair of 'the heart.
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There are more ways of killing a man's love than by strangling it to death, but that's the usual way.
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When you see what some women marry, you realize how they must hate to work for a living.
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Nobody is quite so blase and sophisticated as a boy of nineteen who is just recovering from a baby grand passion
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To make a man perfectly happy tell him he works too hard, that he spends too much money, that he is misunderstood or that he is different none of this is necessarily complimentary, but it will flatter him infinitely more than merely telling him that he is brilliant, or noble, or wise, or good.
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Why does a man take it for granted that a girl who flirts with him wants him to kiss her - when, nine times out of ten, she only wants him to want to kiss her?
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Alas, why will a man spend months trying to hand over his liberty to a woman--and the rest of his life trying to get it back again?
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Every man wants a woman to appeal to his better side, his nobler instincts, and his higher nature - and another woman to help him forget them.
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A husband is what is left of a lover, after the nerve has been extracted.
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Better a lively old epigram than a deadly new one.
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To a man, marriage means giving up four out of five of the chiffonier drawers to a woman, giving up four out of five of her opinions.
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Some men are born for matrimony, some achieve matrimony -- but most of them are merely poor dodgers.
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Nowadays love is a matter of chance, matrimony a matter of money and divorce a matter of course.
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the mistakes you regret the most in your life are the ones you didn't commit when you had the chance
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