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It is as hard to get a man to stay at home after you've married him as it was to get him to go home before you married him.

Helen Rowland

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Helen Rowland
Age: 74 †
Born: 1875
Born: January 1
Died: 1950
Died: January 1
Humorist
Journalist
Married
Stay
Successful
Home
Hard
Men

More quotes by Helen Rowland

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There's so much saint in the worst of them, and so much devil in the best of them, that a woman who's married to one of them, has nothing to learn of the rest of them.
Helen Rowland
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Love is woman's eternal spring and man's eternal fall. It is a game at which men must play against stacked cards, and without the slightest inkling of the trump.
Helen Rowland
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A man never knows how to say goodbye a woman never knows when to say it.
Helen Rowland
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What a man calls his 'conscience' is merely the mental action that follows a sentimental reaction after too much wine or love.
Helen Rowland
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Why does a man take it for granted that a girl who flirts with him wants him to kiss her - when, nine times out of ten, she only wants him to want to kiss her?
Helen Rowland
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Estimated from a wife's experience, the average man spends fully one-quarter of his life in looking for his shoes.
Helen Rowland
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At twenty, a man feels awfully aged and blasé at thirty, almost senile at forty, not so old and at fifty, positively skittish.
Helen Rowland
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To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
Helen Rowland
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A man falls in love through his eyes, a woman through her imagination, and then they both speak of it as an affair of 'the heart.
Helen Rowland
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Going through life without love is like going through a good dinner without an appetite -- everything seems so flat and tasteless.
Helen Rowland
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Marriage is a bargain, and somebody has to get the worst end of the bargain.
Helen Rowland
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There are people whose watch stops at a certain hour and who remain permanently at that age.
Helen Rowland
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There are many times where a woman would gladly drop her husband if she did not feel morally certain that some other woman would come right along and pick him up.
Helen Rowland
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Eve had one advantage over all the rest of her sex. In his wildest moments of rage Adam never could accuse her of being 'just like her mother!
Helen Rowland
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Marriage is the only thing that affords a woman the pleasure of company and the perfect sensation of solitude at the same time.
Helen Rowland
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No girl who is going to marry need bother to win a college degree she just naturally becomes a Master of Arts and a Doctor of Philosophy after catering to an ordinary man for a few years.
Helen Rowland
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A man seldom thinks of marrying when he meets his ideal woman he waits until he gets the marrying fever and then idealizes the first woman he happens to meet.
Helen Rowland
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The feminine vanity-case is the graveyard of masculine illusions.
Helen Rowland
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A man snatches the first kiss, pleads for the second, demands the third, takes the fourth, accepts the fifth - and endures all the rest.
Helen Rowland
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Better a lively old epigram than a deadly new one.
Helen Rowland