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The tenderest spot in a man's make-up is sometimes the bald spot on top of his head.

Helen Rowland

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Helen Rowland
Age: 74 †
Born: 1875
Born: January 1
Died: 1950
Died: January 1
Humorist
Journalist
Make
Bald
Men
Spot
Spots
Humorous
Humor
Head
Funny
Tenderest
Sometimes
Baldness

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the mistakes you regret the most in your life are the ones you didn't commit when you had the chance
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After marriage, a woman's sight becomes so keen that she can see right through her husband without looking at him, and a man's so dull that he can look right through his wife without seeing her.
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A man's ideal woman is the one he couldn't get.
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Wedding: the point at which a man stops toasting a woman and begins roasting her.
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Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.
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Love is a matter of give and take -- marriage, a matter of misgive and mistake.
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At twenty, a man feels awfully aged and blasé at thirty, almost senile at forty, not so old and at fifty, positively skittish.
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A man always mistakes a woman's clinging devotion for weakness, until he discovers that it requires the strength of Samson, the patience of Job, and the finesse of Solomon to untwine it.
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A bachelor gets tangled up with a lot of women in order to avoid getting tied up to one.
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A bride at her second marriage does not wear a veil. She wants to see what she is getting.
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A fool and her money are soon courted.
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A man never knows how to say goodbye a woman never knows when to say it.
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Some men are born for matrimony, some achieve matrimony -- but most of them are merely poor dodgers.
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A man's desire for a son is usually nothing but the wish to duplicate himself in order that such a remarkable pattern may not be lost to the world.
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No girl who is going to marry need bother to win a college degree she just naturally becomes a Master of Arts and a Doctor of Philosophy after catering to an ordinary man for a few years.
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And verily, a woman need know but one man well, in order to understand all men whereas a man may know all women and understand not one of them.
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To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
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A wise woman puts a grain of sugar into everything she says to a man, and takes a grain of salt with everything he says to her.
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A good woman is known by what she does a good man by what he doesn't.
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Falling in love consists merely in uncorking the imagination and bottling the common sense.
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