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A husband is what is left of a lover, after the nerve has been extracted.

Helen Rowland

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Helen Rowland
Age: 74 †
Born: 1875
Born: January 1
Died: 1950
Died: January 1
Humorist
Journalist
Husband
Extracted
Marriage
Nerve
Funny
Hilarious
Left
Cynical
Love
Nerves
Lover
Lovers

More quotes by Helen Rowland

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A bachelor never quite gets over the idea that he is a thing of beauty and a boy forever.
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Some men are born for matrimony, some achieve matrimony -- but most of them are merely poor dodgers.
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Alas, why will a man spend months trying to hand over his liberty to a woman--and the rest of his life trying to get it back again?
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Marriage is a bargain, and somebody has to get the worst end of the bargain.
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It is easier to keep half a dozen lovers guessing than to keep one lover after he has stopped guessing.
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Why does a man take it for granted that a girl who flirts with him wants him to kiss her - when, nine times out of ten, she only wants him to want to kiss her?
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A woman flees from temptation, but a man just crawls away from it in the cheerful hope that it may overtake him.
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Some women blush when they are kissed, some call for the police, some swear, some bite. But the worst are those who laugh.
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A bachelor gets tangled up with a lot of women in order to avoid getting tied up to one.
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A widow is a fascinating being with the flavor of maturity, the spice of experience, the piquancy of novelty, the tang of practiced coquetry, and the halo of one man's approval.
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the mistakes you regret the most in your life are the ones you didn't commit when you had the chance
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There's so much saint in the worst of them, and so much devil in the best of them, that a woman who's married to one of them, has nothing to learn of the rest of them.
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The feminine vanity-case is the graveyard of masculine illusions.
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No girl who is going to marry need bother to win a college degree she just naturally becomes a Master of Arts and a Doctor of Philosophy after catering to an ordinary man for a few years.
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In olden times sacrifices were made at the altar - a practice which is still continued.
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Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.
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There are people whose watch stops at a certain hour and who remain permanently at that age.
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To make a man perfectly happy tell him he works too hard, that he spends too much money, that he is misunderstood or that he is different none of this is necessarily complimentary, but it will flatter him infinitely more than merely telling him that he is brilliant, or noble, or wise, or good.
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To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
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Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.
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