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You'll never get a boyfriend if you look like you wandered out of Auschwitz.

Helen Fielding

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Helen Fielding
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: February 19
Journalist
Novelist
Screenwriter
Writer
Morley
Leeds
Never
Like
Wandered
Auschwitz
Boyfriend
Look
Looks

More quotes by Helen Fielding

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Quite quickly I grew less deranged. I had begun the process of calming down, assimilating and compromising, which is necessary to live comfortably in the world as it is, and probably is why its imbalance never changes. But underneath, my idea of life was completely altered.
Helen Fielding
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It is proved by surveys that happiness does not come from love, wealth, or power but the pursuit of attainable goals.
Helen Fielding
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9p.m. My flat. Feel very strange and empty. Is all very well thinking everything is going to be different when you come back but then it is all the same. Suppose I have to make it different. But what am I going to do with my life? I know. Will eat some cheese.
Helen Fielding
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..we were always taught, instead of waiting to be swept off our feet, to 'expect little, forgive much'.
Helen Fielding
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It is horrid to smirk.
Helen Fielding
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The whole point of diaries is that other people find them and read what you've put. I did once take to writing my inner thoughts on the computer at the end of other things I was writing and ended up faxing four pages of hideous stuff to my accountant so I don't do that now.
Helen Fielding
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Oh God, what's wrong with me? Why does nothing ever work out?
Helen Fielding
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I got into my usual obsessive writing frenzy, using all the material I'd worked on for so long and crafting it into a little novel [Bridget Jones's Baby: The Diaries].
Helen Fielding
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I always market research my books before I hand them in by showing them to five or six close friends who I trust to be honest with me, so they are very heavily re-written already.
Helen Fielding
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If the stories don't come from the inside out, then Bridget [Jones] is not being true to herself and it's very important to me that she stays that way.
Helen Fielding
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You see, things being good has nothing to do with how you feel outside, it is all to do with how you are inside.
Helen Fielding
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Women today are bombarded with so many messages, like we should have Naomi Campbell's body and Madeleine Albright's career.
Helen Fielding
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Oh God. valentine's Day tomorrow. Why? Why? Why is (the) entire world geared to make people not involved in romance feel stupid when everyone knows romance does not work anyway. Look at (the) royal family. Look at Mum and Dad.
Helen Fielding
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It occurred to me that if Africa needed us, sometimes we needed Africa a great deal more.
Helen Fielding
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It struck me as pretty ridiculous to be called Mr. Darcy and to stand on your own looking snooty at a party. It's like being called Heathcliff and insisting on spending the entire evening in the garden, shouting Cathy and banging your head against a tree.
Helen Fielding
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Oh, God, I'm so lonely. An entire weekend streching ahead with no one to love or have fun with. Anyway, I don't care. I've got a lovely steamed ginger pudding from M&S to put in the microwave.
Helen Fielding
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Exes should never, never go out with or marry other people but should remain celibate to the end of their days in order to provide you with a mental fallback position.
Helen Fielding
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Eventually, I manage to cheer Mum up by allowing her to go through my wardrobe and criticize all my clothes.
Helen Fielding
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I think that when you're writing fiction what you're doing is reflecting life as you see it, and putting down how you think and how other people think, and the sort of confusions that you don't normally like to admit to.
Helen Fielding
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I come from Yorkshire in England where we like to eat chip sandwiches - white bread, butter, tomato ketchup and big fat french fries cooked in beef dripping.
Helen Fielding