Smart writers never understand why their satires on our town are never successful. What they refuse to accept is that you can't satirize a satire.

Two of the cruelest, most primitive punishments our town deals out to those who have fallen from favor are the empty mailbox and the silent telephone.

In this life you can take poverty, you can take failure, you can take the big things it's the little griefs that destroy you inside.

Entertainment must be a satisfying emotional experience, a stirring of the heart. We need all kinds of young men and women. Those people with an artist's eye and an executive's brain that we term directors. Those wrestlers with their souls and typewriters known as authors. The beggars on horseback called actors and actresses.

I wasn't allowed to speak while my husband was alive, and since he's gone no one has been able to shut me up.

Dancing came easy to me.

In singing, what my voice lacked in quality it made up in volume.

I got around a lot, and lots of people talked to me. I salted down stories by the barrel load.

I think Lilyan (Tashman) is one of the most amusing people I know but I believe she dresses in too flamboyant a manner. Where some women wear one or two diamond clasps, she wears four!

Ann Sothern's dressing room...was unbelievably lush and beautiful. More elegant than many homes I've been in.

The geniuses who conduct the motion-picture business killed glamour when they decided that what the public wanted was not dream stuff, from which movies used to be made, but realism.

About once every six months someone notifies me that Lucy and Desi Arnaz are separating.

Lucille Ball hates the color of her hair, too, and says `I should wear a sign on my chest saying I hate it, but Technicolor demands it.'

Nobody's interested in sweetness and light.