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As many have observed, it is easy to tell a lie, but it is almost impossible to tell only one.

Harriet Lerner

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Harriet Lerner
Many
Observed
Impossible
Almost
Lying
Easy
Tell

More quotes by Harriet Lerner

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The first world we find ourselves in is a family that is not of our choosing.
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You can't evaluate a prospective partner if you insulate your relationship from your family and friends--and his.
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There are some things for which there is no apology, and on the question of slavery, there is no adequate apology for ripping people out of their homeland and bringing them here in chains. There is no adequate apology for the ongoing horrific legacy of racism.
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The happiest people are focused on living their own life (not someone else's) as well as possible.
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Relationships are most likely to fail when we don't address problems or hold our partner accountable for unfair or irresponsible behavior ... the ability to clarify our values, beliefs, and life goals--and then to keep our behavior congruent with them--is at the heart of a solid marriage.
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Men are often (though not always) the pursuers for sex, just like women are often (though not always) the pursuers for conversation.
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Whole-hearted listening is the greatest spiritual gift you can give to the other person.
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What initially attracts us and what later becomes 'the problem' are usually one and the same.
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If you pursue a distancer, he or she will distance more. Consider it a fundamental law of physics.
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Women are raised to be the nurturers and steadiers of rocked boats, to hold relationships in place as if our lives depended on it. But it shores up your own dignity and integrity if you're able to say, There are a million things I love about you, and I want our relationship to continue. I forgive you 95 percent, but not this 5 percent.
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Self-help books for women are part of a multibillion-dollar industry, sensitively attuned to our insecurities and our purses.
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The strongest relationships are between two people who can live without each other but don't want to.
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We all fear change, even as we seek it.
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Differences don’t just threaten and divide us. They also inform, enrich, and enliven us.
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Often when someone apologizes - like a parent who says to a child, I'm very sorry I neglected you when you were a kid - they also ask, Do you forgive me?, because they want the other person to be over it. However, healing can take a great deal of time. And if we forgive too quickly, we cut the process short.
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It is not fear that stops you from doing the brave and true thing in your daily life. Rather, the problem is avoidance. You want to feel comfortable so you avoid doing or saying the thing that will evoke fear and other difficult emotions. Avoidance will make you feel less vulnerable in the short run but, it will never make you less afraid.
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It's a cliché, but also a deep truth (as cliché's tend to be), that you can't love another person very well if you don't love yourself.
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The term girl not only serves to avoid certain anxiety-arousing connotations inherent in the word woman regarding aggression, sexuality, and reproduction, it also serves to impart a tone of frivolousness and lack of seriousness to ambitious, intellectual, and competitive striving that women may pursue.
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If what we are doing with our anger is not achieving the desired result, it would seem logical to try something different.
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Nothing you say can ensure that the other person will get it, or respond the way you want. You may never exceed his threshold of deafness.
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