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Differences don’t just threaten and divide us. They also inform, enrich, and enliven us.

Harriet Lerner

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Harriet Lerner
Also
Enliven
Enrich
Inform
Threaten
Divide
Divides
Differences

More quotes by Harriet Lerner

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The strongest relationships are between two people who can live without each other but don't want to.
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Silence can pose a greater threat than the difficult truth.
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What initially attracts us and what later becomes 'the problem' are usually one and the same.
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If what we are doing with our anger is not achieving the desired result, it would seem logical to try something different.
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If you pursue a distancer, he or she will distance more. Consider it a fundamental law of physics.
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I'm a good example of wanting to apologize only for my precise share of a problem--as I calculate it, of course--and I expect my husband Steve to apologize for his share, also as I calculate it. Since we're not always of one mind on the math, it can lead to the theater of the absurd.
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Wherever you find a wife and mother-in-law slugging it out, you'll find a son who's not speaking up to either his mother or his wife.
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Through words we come to know the other person--and to be known. This knowing is at the heart of our deepest longings for intimacy and connection with others. How relationships unfold with the most important people in our lives depends on courage and clarity in finding voice.
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the body, seeking truth, sends a signal. But decoding it, interpreting its meaning, and knowing how to proceed from there is another matter entirely.
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The happiest people are focused on living their own life (not someone else's) as well as possible.
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The miracle is that your children will love you with all your imperfections if you can do the same for them.
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Every time I open Facebook, I see a post with something like, We must forgive or be prisoners of our own bitterness and hate. People think that forgiveness is all-or-nothing, but this myth hurts people. You can forgive 10, 97, or 14 percent. Forgiveness is complicated.
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We all fear change, even as we seek it.
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Anger is a signal, and one worth listening to.
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Self-help books for women are part of a multibillion-dollar industry, sensitively attuned to our insecurities and our purses.
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Nothing you say can ensure that the other person will get it, or respond the way you want. You may never exceed his threshold of deafness.
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If you want a recipe for relationship failure, just wait for the other person to change first.
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deception and 'con games' are a way of life in all species and throughout nature. Organisms that do not improve their ability to deceive - and to detect deception - are less apt to survive.
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Sometimes the most helpful thing you can do is to stop trying to be helpful.
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Being who we are requires that we can talk openly about things that are important to us, that we take a clear position on where we stand on important emotional issues, and that we clarify the limits of what is acceptable and tolerable to us in a relationship.
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