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Differences don’t just threaten and divide us. They also inform, enrich, and enliven us.

Harriet Lerner

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Harriet Lerner
Enrich
Inform
Threaten
Divide
Divides
Differences
Also
Enliven

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If you pursue a distancer, he or she will distance more. Consider it a fundamental law of physics.
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Whole-hearted listening is the greatest spiritual gift you can give to the other person.
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Self-help books for women are part of a multibillion-dollar industry, sensitively attuned to our insecurities and our purses.
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We all fear change, even as we seek it.
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Believing that all women should want to be mothers makes about as much sense as believing that all men should want to be engineers.
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Those of us who are locked into ineffective expressions of anger suffer as deeply as those of us who dare not get angry at all.
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deception and 'con games' are a way of life in all species and throughout nature. Organisms that do not improve their ability to deceive - and to detect deception - are less apt to survive.
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The miracle is that your children will love you with all your imperfections if you can do the same for them.
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Although it's not useful to drown in despair, it's also not useful to keep a 'positive attitude' when this means concealing or denying real emotions.
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Wherever you find a wife and mother-in-law slugging it out, you'll find a son who's not speaking up to either his mother or his wife.
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No book or expert can protect us from the range of painful emotions that make us human.
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Relationships are most likely to fail when we don't address problems or hold our partner accountable for unfair or irresponsible behavior ... the ability to clarify our values, beliefs, and life goals--and then to keep our behavior congruent with them--is at the heart of a solid marriage.
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Intensity is not the same as intimacy, although we tend to confuse these two words.
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the body, seeking truth, sends a signal. But decoding it, interpreting its meaning, and knowing how to proceed from there is another matter entirely.
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If what we are doing with our anger is not achieving the desired result, it would seem logical to try something different.
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Anger is a signal, and one worth listening to.
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Being who we are requires that we can talk openly about things that are important to us, that we take a clear position on where we stand on important emotional issues, and that we clarify the limits of what is acceptable and tolerable to us in a relationship.
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We will be in tune with our bodies only if we truly love and honor them. We can't be in good communication with the enemy.
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The first world we find ourselves in is a family that is not of our choosing.
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You can't evaluate a prospective partner if you insulate your relationship from your family and friends--and his.
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