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be careful of monsters with teeth

Harlan Ellison

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Harlan Ellison
Age: 84 †
Born: 1934
Born: May 27
Died: 2018
Died: June 27
Film Critic
Journalist
Literary Critic
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Cleveland
Ohio
Harlan Jay Ellison
Monsters
Teeth
Careful

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Everyone is entitled to an *informed* opinion.
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Writing is the hardest work in the world. I have been a bricklayer and a truck driver, and I tell you – as if you haven't been told a million times already – that writing is harder. Lonelier. And nobler and more enriching.
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Repent, Harlequin, said the Ticktock Man. Get stuffed, the Harlequin replied.
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You are not entitled to your opinion. You are entitled to your informed opinion. No one is entitled to be ignorant.
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With the Internet, the greatest disseminator of bad data and bad information the universe has ever known, it's become impossible to trust any news from any source at all, because it's filtered through this crazy yenta gossip line. It's impossible to know anything.
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I have no mouth. And I must scream.
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Like a wind crying endlessly through the universe, Time carries away the names and the deeds of conquerors and commoners alike. And all that we were, all that remains, is in the memories of those who cared we came this way for a brief moment.
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People don't die from the old diseases any more. They die from new ones, but that's Progress, isn't it? Isn't it?
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Writing is a holy chore.
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A man may truly live in his dreams, his noblest dreams, but only, only if he is worthy of those dreams.
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In these days of widespread illiteracy, functional illiteracy... anything that keeps people stupid is a felony.
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I don't mind you thinking I'm stupid, but don't talk to me like I'm stupid.
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My philosophy of life is that the meek shall inherit nothing but debasement, frustration, and ignoble deaths.
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I can't picture in my mind three hundred and sixty thousand dollars... When I think of it, all I can see in my mind is a big nickel.
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Love ain't nothing but sex misspelled.
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I will live to piss in the open mouths or the open graves of my enemies, whichever comes first.
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For the first time we have a weapon that nobody has used for thirty years. This gives me great hope for the human race.
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What I try to write about are the darkest things in the soul, the mortal dreads... The closer I get to the burning core of my being, the things which are most painful to me, the better is my work.
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The real story of our times is seldom told in the horse-puckey-filled memoirs of dopey, self-serving presidents or generals, but in the outrageous, demented lives of guys like Lenny Bruce, Giordano Bruno, Scott Fitzgerald - and Paul Krassner. The burrs under society's saddle. The pains in the ass.
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Thank your readers and the critics who praise you, and then ignore them. Write for the most intelligent, wittiest, wisest audience in the universe: Write to please yourself.
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