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When you sympathize with a married woman you either make two enemies or gain one wife and one friend.
H. L. Mencken
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H. L. Mencken
Age: 75 †
Born: 1880
Born: September 12
Died: 1956
Died: January 29
Autobiographer
Essayist
Historian
Journalist
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Literary Critic
Satirist
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Writer
Baltimore
Maryland
Henry Louis Mencken
Two
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More quotes by H. L. Mencken
The book of Genesis, a farrago of nonsense so wholly absurd that even Sunday-school scholars have to be threatened with Hell to make them accept it.
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Happiness is the china shop love is the bull.
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Wife: one who is sorry she did it, but would undoubtedly do it again.
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There is nothing worse than an idle hour, with no occupation offering. People who have many such hours are simply animals waiting docilely for death. We all come to that state soon or late. It is the curse of senility.
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I never lecture, not because I am shy or a bad speaker, but simply because I detest the sort of people who go to lectures and don't want to meet them.
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During many a single week, I daresay, more money is spent in New York upon useless and evil things than would suffice to run the kingdom of Denmark for a year.
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The best years are the forties after fifty a man begins to deteriorate, but in the forties he is at the maximum of his villainy.
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A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin.
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Absence is the dark-room in which lovers develop negatives.
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Women have simple tastes. They get pleasure out of the conversation of children in arms and men in love.
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New York is the place where all the aspirations of the western world meet to form one vast master aspiration, as powerful as the suction of a steam dredge. It is the icing on the pie called Christian civilization.
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I write in order to attain that feeling of tension relieved and function achieved which a cow enjoys on giving milk.
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Platitude: an idea (a) that is admitted to be true by everyone, and (b) that is not true.
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Happiness, like health, is probably also only a passing accident. For a moment or two the organism is irritated so little that it is not conscious of it for the duration of that moment it is happy. Thus a hog is always happier than a man, and a bacillus is happier than a hog
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The sort of man who likes to spend his time watching a cage of monkeys chase one another, or a lion gnaw its tail, or a lizard catch flies, is precisely the sort of man whose mental weakness should be combated at the public expense, not fostered.
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Whenever a reporter is assigned to cover a Methodist conference, he comes home an atheist.
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Who ever heard, indeed, of an autobiography that was not (interesting)? I can recall none in all the literature of the world
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There is something even more valuable to civilization than wisdom, and that is character.
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It is Hell, of course, that makes priests powerful, not Heaven, for after thousands of years of so-called civilization fear remains the one common denominator of mankind
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To argue that the gaps in knowledge which confront the seeker must be filled, not by patient inquiry, but by intuition or revelation, is simply to give ignorance a gratuitous and preposterous dignity.
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