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Alimony - the ransom that the happy pay to the devil.
H. L. Mencken
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H. L. Mencken
Age: 75 †
Born: 1880
Born: September 12
Died: 1956
Died: January 29
Autobiographer
Essayist
Historian
Journalist
Linguist
Literary Critic
Satirist
Social Critic
Writer
Baltimore
Maryland
Henry Louis Mencken
Pay
Marriage
Happy
Alimony
Ransom
Devil
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The pedant and the priest have always been the most expert of logicians - and the most diligent disseminators of nonsense and worse.
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A judge is a law student who marks his own examination papers.
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Imagine the Creator as a low comedian, and at once the world becomes explicable.
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Puritanism. The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.
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Strike an average between what a woman thinks of her husband a month before she marries him and what she thinks of him a year afterward, and you will have the truth about him.
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The motive of fear is the be-all and end-all of religion.
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A man is called a good fellow for doing things which, if done by a woman, would land her in a lunatic asylum.
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Whenever a husband and wife begin to discuss their marriage they are giving evidence at a coroner's inquest.
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The first kiss is stolen by the man the last is begged by the woman.
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A prohibitionist is the sort of man one couldn't care to drink with, even if he drank.
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Absence is the dark-room in which lovers develop negatives.
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To argue that the gaps in knowledge which confront the seeker must be filled, not by patient inquiry, but by intuition or revelation, is simply to give ignorance a gratuitous and preposterous dignity.
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Watching two women kiss is like watching two prizefighters shake hands.
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No democratic delusion is more fatuous than that which holds that all men are capable of reason, and hence susceptible to conversion by evidence. If religions depended upon evidence for their prolongation, then all of them would collapse.
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Every man is his own hell.
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In every woman's life there is one real and consuming love. But very few women guess which one it is.
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The theatre, when all is said and done, is not life in miniature, but life enormously magnified, life hideously exaggerated.
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The chief contribution of Protestantism to human thought is its massive proof that God is a bore.
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When I hear a man applauded by the mob I always feel a pang of pity for him. All he has to do to be hissed is to live long enough.
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It is surely no mere coincidence that the land of the emancipated and enthroned woman is also the land of canned soup, of canned pork and beans, of whole meals in cans, and of everything else ready made.
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