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If the garbage man calls, tell him we don't want any.

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Garbage
Calls
Tell
Men

More quotes by Groucho Marx

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My experience is that people are most likely to listen to reason when in bed.
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I shall drink no # wine before it's time! OK, it's time.
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Poverty makes people sub-human Excess of wealth makes people inhuman
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To write an autobiography of Groucho Marx would be as asinine as to read an autobiography of Groucho Marx.
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There's only two things you can start without a plan: a riot and a family, for everything else you need a plan.
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Now there's a man with an open mind - you can feel the breeze from here!
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[Mrs. Teasdale]: He's had a change of heart. [Groucho]: A lot of good that'll do him. He's still got the same face.
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The difference between a politician and a snail is that the snail leaves its slime behind. Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
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Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy.
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I've known and respected your husband for many years, and what's good enough for him is good enough for me
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If you are not having fun you are doing something wrong.
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Patience is the art of finding something else to do.
Groucho Marx
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Remember men, you are fighting for the ladies honor, which is probably more than she ever did.
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If income tax is the price you have to pay to keep the government on its feet, alimony is the price we have to pay for sweeping a woman off hers.
Groucho Marx
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Women should be obscene, not heard.
Groucho Marx
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The foods that are recommended today are as palatable as a steady diet of wet blotters.
Groucho Marx
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Even the intellectual crowd will have none of me. Physically, I look like one of them. Graying at the temples, I walk with a slight limp and wear thick glasses.
Groucho Marx
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My mother loved children - she would have given anything if I had been one.
Groucho Marx
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No, Groucho is not my real name. I am breaking it in for a friend.
Groucho Marx
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Don't be silly. I'll write you twice a week.
Groucho Marx