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TV is the rat race of the century.

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Rats
Century
Race

More quotes by Groucho Marx

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Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.
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This book was written in those long hours I spent waiting for my wife to get dressed to go out. And if she had never gotten dressed at all this book would never have been written.
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I am a man and you are a woman. I can't think of a better arrangement.
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Since my daughter is only half-Jewish, could she go in the water up to her knees?
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Even the intellectual crowd will have none of me. Physically, I look like one of them. Graying at the temples, I walk with a slight limp and wear thick glasses.
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Television is where you watch people in your living room that you would not want near your house.
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Do you suppose I could buy back my introduction to you?
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You know I could rent you out as a decoy for duck hunters?
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I don't know. When I was born there was a nurse taking care of me. What's the matter? Couldn't the nurse take care of herself? Sure she could. I just found that out too late.
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When discovered by his wife, kissing the maid, Groucho said, I was just whispering in her mouth
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Making love to your wife is like shooting at sitting ducks.
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It isn't so much that hard times are coming the change observed is mostly soft times going.
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Women should be obscene, not heard.
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I read in the newspapers they are going to have 30 minutes of intellectual stuff on television every Monday from 7:30 to 8. to educate America. They couldn't educate America if they started at 6:30.
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Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water!
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Here's to our wives and girlfriends...may they never meet!
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I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.
Groucho Marx
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The foods that are recommended today are as palatable as a steady diet of wet blotters.
Groucho Marx
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Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx
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Two women at a resort discussed dinner: The food here is lousy, the first noted. You're right! And such small portions!! the second added
Groucho Marx