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Money cannot buy you happiness, and happiness cannot buy you money. That might be a wise crack, but I doubt it.

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Might
Crack
Cracks
Wise
Doubt
Happiness
Money
Cannot

More quotes by Groucho Marx

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I did toy with the idea of doing a cook-book. . . . I think a lot of people who hate literature but love fried eggs would buy it if the price was right.
Groucho Marx
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You bet I'm shy. I'm a shyster lawyer.
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Years ago, I tried to top everybody, but I don't anymore. I realized it was killing conversation. When you're always trying for a topper you aren't really listening. It ruins communication
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I think you've got something there, but I'll wait outside until you clean it up.
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If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you.
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Television is where you watch people in your living room that you would not want near your house.
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Alimony is like buying hay for a dead horse.
Groucho Marx
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I can see you in the kitchen bending over a hot stove, and I can't see the stove
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Before you speak, make certain you have something worthwhile to say.
Groucho Marx
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You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar.
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I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.
Groucho Marx
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I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.
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Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
Groucho Marx
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I've known and respected your husband for many years, and what's good enough for him is good enough for me
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Time wounds all heels.
Groucho Marx
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It's hard to get ivory in Africa, but in Alabama the Tuscaloosa
Groucho Marx
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You get a canoe later and I'll paddle you.
Groucho Marx
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I don't want to join the kind of a club that accepts people like me as members.
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Making love to your wife is like shooting at sitting ducks.
Groucho Marx
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Chico: Here's the book, it's a dollar Groucho: Here's a ten, and shoot the change. Chico: I don't have change I'd have to give you nine more books.
Groucho Marx