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Given the choice between a woman and a cigar, I will always choose the cigar.

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Always
Cigar
Smoking
Choice
Choose
Choices
Woman
Given

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If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.
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Before I speak, I have something important to say.
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Why should I care about posterity? What's posterity ever done for me?
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Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
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A moose is an animal with horns on the front of its head and a hunting lodge wall on the back of it
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That's bad luck: three on a midget. From At The Circus
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Patience is the art of finding something else to do.
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Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water!
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It is impossible to design anything that is foolproof because fools are so ingenious.
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I don’t have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They’re upstairs in my socks.
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Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.
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One woman and one man might have been OK in your grandmother's day, but who wants to marry your grandmother? Not even your grandfather!
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I have nothing but respect for you -- and not much of that.
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Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
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You know I could rent you out as a decoy for duck hunters?
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