Quote

Given the choice between a woman and a cigar, I will always choose the cigar.

Groucho Marx

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Choice
Choose
Choices
Woman
Given
Always
Cigar
Smoking

More quotes by Groucho Marx

Image
Dig trenches? With our men being killed off like flies? There isn't time to dig trenches. We'll have to buy them ready made.
Groucho Marx
Image
Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does.
Groucho Marx
Image
I think women are sexy when they got some clothes on. And if later they take them off then you've triumphed. Somebody once said it's what you dont see you're interested in, and this is true.
Groucho Marx
Image
Obviously there was no point in being a bachelor if his houseman was going to filch his booze. If he was going to get robbed, he might just as well get married.
Groucho Marx
Image
You're only as young as the woman you feel.
Groucho Marx
Image
I met my wife on a ferry boat, and when we landed she gave me the slip
Groucho Marx
Image
Well, Art is Art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water. And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now you tell me what you know.
Groucho Marx
Image
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
Groucho Marx
Image
Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book, and does.
Groucho Marx
Image
A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
Groucho Marx
Image
[He] may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you: he really is an idiot.
Groucho Marx
Image
Time wounds all heels.
Groucho Marx
Image
I shall drink no # wine before it's time! OK, it's time.
Groucho Marx
Image
When discovered by his wife, kissing the maid, Groucho said, I was just whispering in her mouth
Groucho Marx
Image
I did toy with the idea of doing a cook-book. . . . I think a lot of people who hate literature but love fried eggs would buy it if the price was right.
Groucho Marx
Image
Chico: Here's the book, it's a dollar Groucho: Here's a ten, and shoot the change. Chico: I don't have change I'd have to give you nine more books.
Groucho Marx
Image
Oh, are you from Wales? Do you know a fella named Jonah-He used to live in whales for a while
Groucho Marx
Image
Before I speak, I have something important to say.
Groucho Marx
Image
I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.
Groucho Marx
Image
Three years ago I came to Florida without a nickel in my pocket. Now I've got a nickel in my pocket
Groucho Marx