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Remember, the grass is always greener where you don't happen to be the neighbor.
Groucho Marx
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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Life
Greener
Grass
Neighbor
Happen
Happens
Remember
Always
More quotes by Groucho Marx
Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.
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Money cannot buy you happiness, and happiness cannot buy you money. That might be a wise crack, but I doubt it.
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It is impossible to design anything that is foolproof because fools are so ingenious.
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You've got a goal in life. I've got a goal. Now all we need is a football team.
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If you are not having fun you are doing something wrong.
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I think that the Peeps or Peppies or Pipes diaries would be much more popular had there been a universal pronuncation of his name.
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Why don't you go home to your wife? Better yet, I'll go home to your wife, and outside of the improvement, she won't notice any difference.
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I don't want to join the kind of a club that accepts people like me as members.
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A cigar makers organization once said that I was the most famous cigar smoker in the world. I dont know if thats true, but once while visiting Havana, I went to a cigar factory. There were four hundred people there rolling cigars, and when they saw me, they all stood up and applauded.
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She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
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My experience is that people are most likely to listen to reason when in bed.
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I know, I know - you're a woman who's had a lot of tough breaks. Well, we can clean and tighten those brakes, but you'll have to stay in the garage all night.
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There's only two things you can start without a plan: a riot and a family, for everything else you need a plan.
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Since my daughter is only half-Jewish, could she go in the water up to her knees?
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Come on in girls, and leave all hope behind.
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Any place I hang my head is home.
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You get a canoe later and I'll paddle you.
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You are going Uruguay, and I'm going my way
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Making love to your wife is like shooting at sitting ducks.
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John you say you met in an elevator. Was the elevator going up at the time, or down? This is very important, for going down in an elevator one always has that sinking feeling and for all I know you may have this confused with love. If you were going up, it is clearly a case of love at first sight.
Groucho Marx
