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Ever since they found out that Lassie was a boy, the public has believed the worst about Hollywood
Groucho Marx
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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Inspiration
Worst
Public
Since
Found
Lassie
Ever
Believed
Hollywood
Boys
More quotes by Groucho Marx
There's one thing I always wanted to do before I quit... Retire!
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There's a man outside with a big black mustache. - Tell him I've got one.
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How do you feel about women's rights? I like either side of them.
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If income tax is the price you have to pay to keep the government on its feet, alimony is the price we have to pay for sweeping a woman off hers.
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Some day there will have to be some new rules established about name-calling. I don't mean the routine cursing that goes on between husband and wife, but the naming of defenseless, unsuspecting babies.
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She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
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I have an agreement with the houseflies. The flies don't practice law and I don't walk on the ceiling.
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I write by ear. I tried writing with the typewriter, but I found it too unwieldy
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Women should be obscene, not heard.
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Do you suppose I could buy back my introduction to you?
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I can't understand why you don't get any mail from me. Perhaps it's because I haven't been writing
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The foods that are recommended today are as palatable as a steady diet of wet blotters.
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That's nothing - my alarm clock is set for eight.
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You bet I'm shy. I'm a shyster lawyer.
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I think women are sexy when they got some clothes on. And if later they take them off then you've triumphed. Somebody once said it's what you dont see you're interested in, and this is true.
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Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water!
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Well I thought my razor was dull until I heard his speech, and that reminds me of a story that's so dirty I'm ashamed to think of it myself.
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I don't know. When I was born there was a nurse taking care of me. What's the matter? Couldn't the nurse take care of herself? Sure she could. I just found that out too late.
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I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.
Groucho Marx
Since my daughter is only half-Jewish, could she go in the water up to her knees?
Groucho Marx
