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I write by ear. I tried writing with the typewriter, but I found it too unwieldy

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Tried
Humor
Inspiration
Funny
Write
Unwieldy
Found
Typewriter
Writing
Typewriters
Ears

More quotes by Groucho Marx

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Budget: a way of going broke methodically
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I don’t have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They’re upstairs in my socks.
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I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.
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Madam, you're making history, in fact, you're making me, and I wish you'd keep my hands to yourself
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I think you've got something there, but I'll wait outside until you clean it up.
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If it gets any hotter in here I could use a big fan.
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A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
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Making love to your wife is like shooting at sitting ducks.
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Why a four-year-old child could understand this report. Run out and find me a four-year-old child. I can't make head nor tail out of it.
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I did toy with the idea of doing a cook-book. . . . I think a lot of people who hate literature but love fried eggs would buy it if the price was right.
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I think that the Peeps or Peppies or Pipes diaries would be much more popular had there been a universal pronuncation of his name.
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Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.
Groucho Marx
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Mrs. Teasdale congratulates him on his coronation and sovereignty: The eyes of the world are upon you. Notables from every country are gathered here in your honor. This is a gala day for you. Firefly replies: Well, a gal a day is enough for me. I don't think I could handle any more.
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If the garbage man calls, tell him we don't want any.
Groucho Marx
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I have nothing but respect for you -- and not much of that.
Groucho Marx
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I don't have change I'd have to give you nine more books
Groucho Marx
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If you were a man, you'd go into business for yourself. I know a fellow who started out last year with just a canoe. Now he's got more women than you can shake a stick at, if that's your idea of a good time.
Groucho Marx
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I'll teach you to kick me...' You don't need to teach me--I already know how!
Groucho Marx
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Television is where you watch people in your living room that you would not want near your house.
Groucho Marx
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If women dressed for men, the stores wouldn't sell much - just an occasional sun visor.
Groucho Marx