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Oh, are you from Wales? Do you know a fella named Jonah-He used to live in whales for a while
Groucho Marx
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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Named
Inspiration
Used
Live
Fella
Fellas
Jonah
Wales
Whales
More quotes by Groucho Marx
Why a four-year-old child could understand this report. Run out and find me a four-year-old child. I can't make head nor tail out of it.
Groucho Marx
And stop pointing that beard at me, it might go off!
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Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.
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Gerald Ford was unknown throughout America. Now he's unknown throughout the world.
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[He] may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you: he really is an idiot.
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If women dressed for men, the stores wouldn't sell much - just an occasional sun visor.
Groucho Marx
I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.
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Before I speak, I have something important to say.
Groucho Marx
Do you suppose I could buy back my introduction to you?
Groucho Marx
You bet I'm shy. I'm a shyster lawyer.
Groucho Marx
I don't know. When I was born there was a nurse taking care of me. What's the matter? Couldn't the nurse take care of herself? Sure she could. I just found that out too late.
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Either he's dead or my watch has stopped.
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I don't want to join the kind of a club that accepts people like me as members.
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Dig trenches? With our men being killed off like flies? There isn't time to dig trenches. We'll have to buy them ready made.
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Don't let the fear of the thorn keep you from the rose.
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Why don't you bore a hole in yourself and let the sap run out?
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To write an autobiography of Groucho Marx would be as asinine as to read an autobiography of Groucho Marx.
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Why don't you go home to your wife? Better yet, I'll go home to your wife, and outside of the improvement, she won't notice any difference.
Groucho Marx
Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
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I have nothing but respect for you -- and not much of that.
Groucho Marx
