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You are going Uruguay, and I'm going my way

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Inspiration
Going
Way
Uruguay

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If the garbage man calls, tell him we don't want any.
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[He] may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you: he really is an idiot.
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You bet I'm shy. I'm a shyster lawyer.
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Time flies like an arrow fruit flies like a banana
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Mr.Blank's reputation as a card shark had preceded him. No one accused him of being dishonest, but on the other hand no one accused him of being honest.
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Only if the computers really love each other.
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The difference between a politician and a snail is that the snail leaves its slime behind. Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
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Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men -- the other 999 follow women.
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Love had forged ahead so swiftly that in no time it had displaced agriculture as the leading industry of the period. To anyone who has tried both, this wont come as much of a surprise.
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I think you've got something there, but I'll wait outside until you clean it up.
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Madam, you're making history, in fact, you're making me, and I wish you'd keep my hands to yourself
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Take two turkeys, one goose, four cabbages, but no duck, and mix them together. After one taste, you'll duck soup for the rest of your life
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Money cannot buy you happiness, and happiness cannot buy you money. That might be a wise crack, but I doubt it.
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A woman can smell mink through six inches of lead.
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If income tax is the price you have to pay to keep the government on its feet, alimony is the price we have to pay for sweeping a woman off hers.
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I must confess, I was born at a very early age.
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I don’t have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They’re upstairs in my socks.
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I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining.
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John you say you met in an elevator. Was the elevator going up at the time, or down? This is very important, for going down in an elevator one always has that sinking feeling and for all I know you may have this confused with love. If you were going up, it is clearly a case of love at first sight.
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I'll teach you to kick me...' You don't need to teach me--I already know how!
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