Quote

Now that you're Secretary of War, what kind of an army do you think we ought to have?

Groucho Marx

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Think
Secretary
Thinking
Army
Standing
Ought
War
Money
Wells
Firefly
Kind
Chairs

More quotes by Groucho Marx

Image
She's afraid that if she leaves, she'll become the life of the party.
Groucho Marx
Image
I never go to movies where the hero's tits are bigger than the heroine's.
Groucho Marx
Image
Before you speak, make certain you have something worthwhile to say.
Groucho Marx
Image
The first part of the party of the first part shall be known in this contract as the first part of the party of the first part shall be known in this contract-- Look, why should we quarrel about a thing like this? We'll take it right out, eh?
Groucho Marx
Image
This book was written in those long hours I spent waiting for my wife to get dressed to go out. And if she had never gotten dressed at all this book would never have been written.
Groucho Marx
Image
Do you suppose I could buy back my introduction to you?
Groucho Marx
Image
Two women at a resort discussed dinner: The food here is lousy, the first noted. You're right! And such small portions!! the second added
Groucho Marx
Image
It's hard to get ivory in Africa, but in Alabama the Tuscaloosa
Groucho Marx
Image
I am a man and you are a woman. I can't think of a better arrangement.
Groucho Marx
Image
I met my wife on a ferry boat, and when we landed she gave me the slip
Groucho Marx
Image
Gerald Ford was unknown throughout America. Now he's unknown throughout the world.
Groucho Marx
Image
A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
Groucho Marx
Image
If you want to see a comic strip, you should see me in the shower.
Groucho Marx
Image
I'm not crazy about reality, but it's still the only place to get a decent meal.
Groucho Marx
Image
The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open.
Groucho Marx
Image
The trouble with writing a book about yourself is that you can’t fool around. If you write about someone else, you can stretch the truth from here to Finland. If you write about yourself the slightest deviation makes you realize instantly that there may be honor among thieves, but you are just a dirty liar.
Groucho Marx
Image
Why a four-year-old child could understand this report. Run out and find me a four-year-old child. I can't make head nor tail out of it.
Groucho Marx
Image
If the garbage man calls, tell him we don't want any.
Groucho Marx
Image
I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.
Groucho Marx
Image
I can't understand why you don't get any mail from me. Perhaps it's because I haven't been writing
Groucho Marx