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She's afraid that if she leaves, she'll become the life of the party.
Groucho Marx
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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Leaves
Afraid
Inspiration
Party
Become
Life
More quotes by Groucho Marx
A thing that has always baffled me about women is that they will saturate themselves with a pint of perfume, a pound of sachet powder, an evil-smelling lip rouge, a peculiar-smelling hair ointment and a half-dozen varieties of body oils, and then have the effrontery to complain of the aroma of a fine dollar cigar.
Groucho Marx
Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.
Groucho Marx
A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
Groucho Marx
Anyone buying this book is going to be out a tidy sum if he is sucked in by the title. I wish I could write a real sexy book that would be barred from the mails. Apparently nothing whets a reader's appetite for literature more than the news that the author has been thrown into a federal pokey for disturbing the libido of millions of Americans.
Groucho Marx
Firefly: Where is your husband? Mrs. Teasdale: Why, he's dead. Firefly: I'll bet he's just using that as an excuse. Mrs. Teasdale: I was with him to the very end. Firefly: Hmmph. No wonder he passed away. Mrs. Teasdale: I held him in my arms and kissed him. Firefly: Oh I see. Then, it was murder.
Groucho Marx
Why don't you bore a hole in yourself and let the sap run out?
Groucho Marx
I have nothing but respect for you -- and not much of that.
Groucho Marx
A clown is like aspirin, only he works twice as fast.
Groucho Marx
Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
Groucho Marx
Well, art is art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water.
Groucho Marx
Heifer cow is better than none, but this is no time for puns
Groucho Marx
My experience is that people are most likely to listen to reason when in bed.
Groucho Marx
Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.
Groucho Marx
You bet I'm shy. I'm a shyster lawyer.
Groucho Marx
Anybody who doesn't like this book is healthy
Groucho Marx
Don't let the fear of the thorn keep you from the rose.
Groucho Marx
A woman can smell mink through six inches of lead.
Groucho Marx
Alimony is like buying hay for a dead horse.
Groucho Marx
Chico: Here's the book, it's a dollar Groucho: Here's a ten, and shoot the change. Chico: I don't have change I'd have to give you nine more books.
Groucho Marx
I don’t have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They’re upstairs in my socks.
Groucho Marx
