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If you were a man, you'd go into business for yourself. I know a fellow who started out last year with just a canoe. Now he's got more women than you can shake a stick at, if that's your idea of a good time.

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Good
Year
Canoe
Men
Lasts
Shake
Time
Last
Shakes
Idea
Stick
Business
Fellow
Women
Sticks
Ideas
Fellows
Years
Started

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Any place I hang my head is home.
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If they'd lower the taxes and get rid of the smog and clean up the traffic mess, I really believe I'd settle here until the next earthquake.
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A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
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I don’t have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They’re upstairs in my socks.
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Three years ago I came to Florida without a nickel in my pocket. Now I've got a nickel in my pocket
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Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
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Don't let the fear of the thorn keep you from the rose.
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When I invite a woman to dinner, I expect her to look at my face. That's the price she has to pay.
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Patience is the art of finding something else to do.
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If it gets any hotter in here I could use a big fan.
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Yes, darling, let me cover your face with kisses-On second thought, just let me cover your face
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Before I speak, I have something important to say.
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Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book, and does.
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Heifer cow is better than none, but this is no time for puns
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There's only two things you can start without a plan: a riot and a family, for everything else you need a plan.
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It isn't so much that hard times are coming the change observed is mostly soft times going.
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If income tax is the price you have to pay to keep the government on its feet, alimony is the price we have to pay for sweeping a woman off hers.
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[He] may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you: he really is an idiot.
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I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining.
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