Quote

If you were a man, you'd go into business for yourself. I know a fellow who started out last year with just a canoe. Now he's got more women than you can shake a stick at, if that's your idea of a good time.

Groucho Marx

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Idea
Stick
Business
Fellow
Women
Sticks
Ideas
Fellows
Years
Started
Good
Year
Canoe
Men
Lasts
Shake
Time
Last
Shakes

More quotes by Groucho Marx

Image
There's one thing I always wanted to do before I quit... Retire!
Groucho Marx
Image
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx
Image
Hello, I must be going, I cannot stay, I came to say, I must be going. I’m glad I came, but just the same, I must be going.
Groucho Marx
Image
Every time someone turns on a TV, I go in the other room and read.
Groucho Marx
Image
The Arab and the camel are inseparable. It's been said that and Arab would give up his wife rather than give up his camel. Personally, I haven't got a camel, but I think it's a great idea.
Groucho Marx
Image
Why don't you go home to your wife? Better yet, I'll go home to your wife, and outside of the improvement, she won't notice any difference.
Groucho Marx
Image
I read in the newspapers they are going to have 30 minutes of intellectual stuff on television every Monday from 7:30 to 8. to educate America. They couldn't educate America if they started at 6:30.
Groucho Marx
Image
If women dressed for men, the stores wouldn't sell much - just an occasional sun visor.
Groucho Marx
Image
A moose is an animal with horns on the front of its head and a hunting lodge wall on the back of it
Groucho Marx
Image
Three years ago I came to Florida without a nickel in my pocket. Now I've got a nickel in my pocket
Groucho Marx
Image
To write an autobiography of Groucho Marx would be as asinine as to read an autobiography of Groucho Marx.
Groucho Marx
Image
Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.
Groucho Marx
Image
I don't want to join the kind of a club that accepts people like me as members.
Groucho Marx
Image
Come on in girls, and leave all hope behind.
Groucho Marx
Image
If income tax is the price you have to pay to keep the government on its feet, alimony is the price we have to pay for sweeping a woman off hers.
Groucho Marx
Image
She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
Groucho Marx
Image
I don't know. When I was born there was a nurse taking care of me. What's the matter? Couldn't the nurse take care of herself? Sure she could. I just found that out too late.
Groucho Marx
Image
A clown is like aspirin, only he works twice as fast.
Groucho Marx
Image
I was going to thrash them within an inch of their lives, but I didn't have a tape measure.
Groucho Marx
Image
If we had some eggs we could have eggs and ham, if we had some ham.
Groucho Marx