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Will you marry me? Do you have any money? Answer the second question first.

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Firsts
First
Marry
Answer
Second
Question
Inspiration
Answers
Money

More quotes by Groucho Marx

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I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.
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I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.
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Before you speak, make certain you have something worthwhile to say.
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If we had some eggs we could have eggs and ham, if we had some ham.
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No man goes before his time - unless the boss leaves early.
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He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days.
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Mrs. Teasdale congratulates him on his coronation and sovereignty: The eyes of the world are upon you. Notables from every country are gathered here in your honor. This is a gala day for you. Firefly replies: Well, a gal a day is enough for me. I don't think I could handle any more.
Groucho Marx
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Marry me and I'll never look at another horse!
Groucho Marx
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Oh, are you from Wales? Do you know a fella named Jonah-He used to live in whales for a while
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Patience is the art of finding something else to do.
Groucho Marx
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If you want to see a comic strip, you should see me in the shower.
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Every time someone turns on a TV, I go in the other room and read.
Groucho Marx
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I've known and respected your husband for many years, and what's good enough for him is good enough for me
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A moose is an animal with horns on the front of its head and a hunting lodge wall on the back of it
Groucho Marx
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I shall drink no # wine before it's time! OK, it's time.
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It's hard to get ivory in Africa, but in Alabama the Tuscaloosa
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Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.
Groucho Marx
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I don't want to join the kind of a club that accepts people like me as members.
Groucho Marx
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If they'd lower the taxes and get rid of the smog and clean up the traffic mess, I really believe I'd settle here until the next earthquake.
Groucho Marx
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[He] may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you: he really is an idiot.
Groucho Marx