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There's a man outside with a big black mustache. - Tell him I've got one.

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Outside
Bigs
Black
Tell
Men
Mustache

More quotes by Groucho Marx

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How much would you want to stand at the wrong end of a shooting gallery?
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I read in the newspapers they are going to have 30 minutes of intellectual stuff on television every Monday from 7:30 to 8. to educate America. They couldn't educate America if they started at 6:30.
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Three years ago I came to Florida without a nickel in my pocket. Now I've got a nickel in my pocket
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All people are born alike - except Republicans and Democrats.
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I was going to thrash them within an inch of their lives, but I didn't have a tape measure.
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A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
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TV is the rat race of the century.
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Obviously there was no point in being a bachelor if his houseman was going to filch his booze. If he was going to get robbed, he might just as well get married.
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Why don't you go home to your wife? Better yet, I'll go home to your wife, and outside of the improvement, she won't notice any difference.
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You're only as young as the woman you feel.
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If we had some eggs we could have eggs and ham, if we had some ham.
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Alimony is like buying hay for a dead horse.
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I can see you in the kitchen bending over a hot stove, and I can't see the stove
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I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining.
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I don't want to join the kind of a club that accepts people like me as members.
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You are going Uruguay, and I'm going my way
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She's afraid that if she leaves, she'll become the life of the party.
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My experience is that people are most likely to listen to reason when in bed.
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Now there's a man with an open mind - you can feel the breeze from here!
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Heifer cow is better than none, but this is no time for puns
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