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If income tax is the price you have to pay to keep the government on its feet, alimony is the price we have to pay for sweeping a woman off hers.

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Income
Taxes
Pay
Feet
Woman
Keep
Alimony
Government
Sweeping
Price

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Comedians are a much rarer and far more valuable commodity than all the gold and precious stones in the world.
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One woman and one man might have been OK in your grandmother's day, but who wants to marry your grandmother? Not even your grandfather!
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I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
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Three years ago I came to Florida without a nickel in my pocket. Now I've got a nickel in my pocket
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Middle age is when you go to bed at night and hope you feel better in the morning. Old age is when you go to bed at night and hope you wake up in the morning.
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TV is the rat race of the century.
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Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men -- the other 999 follow women.
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The Two Most Important Words In The World Are Honesty And Sincerity, If You Can Fake These You've Got It Made.
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And stop pointing that beard at me, it might go off!
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If you want to see a comic strip, you should see me in the shower.
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There's one thing I always wanted to do before I quit... Retire!
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A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
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You bet I'm shy. I'm a shyster lawyer.
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Any place I hang my head is home.
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Firefly: Where is your husband? Mrs. Teasdale: Why, he's dead. Firefly: I'll bet he's just using that as an excuse. Mrs. Teasdale: I was with him to the very end. Firefly: Hmmph. No wonder he passed away. Mrs. Teasdale: I held him in my arms and kissed him. Firefly: Oh I see. Then, it was murder.
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Well, art is art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water.
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Love had forged ahead so swiftly that in no time it had displaced agriculture as the leading industry of the period. To anyone who has tried both, this wont come as much of a surprise.
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Humor is reason gone mad.
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Poverty makes people sub-human Excess of wealth makes people inhuman
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To write an autobiography of Groucho Marx would be as asinine as to read an autobiography of Groucho Marx.
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