Quote

I was going to thrash them within an inch of their lives, but I didn't have a tape measure.

Groucho Marx

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Lives
Didn
Going
Thrash
Inch
Inches
Tape
Measure
Within

More quotes by Groucho Marx

Image
To write an autobiography of Groucho Marx would be as asinine as to read an autobiography of Groucho Marx.
Groucho Marx
Image
Let there be dancing in the streets, drinking in the saloons, and necking in the parlor.
Groucho Marx
Image
Hello, I must be going, I cannot stay, I came to say, I must be going. I’m glad I came, but just the same, I must be going.
Groucho Marx
Image
Why don't you bore a hole in yourself and let the sap run out?
Groucho Marx
Image
Obviously there was no point in being a bachelor if his houseman was going to filch his booze. If he was going to get robbed, he might just as well get married.
Groucho Marx
Image
Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
Groucho Marx
Image
If the garbage man calls, tell him we don't want any.
Groucho Marx
Image
Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
Groucho Marx
Image
[He] may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you: he really is an idiot.
Groucho Marx
Image
If you are not having fun you are doing something wrong.
Groucho Marx
Image
Don't let the fear of the thorn keep you from the rose.
Groucho Marx
Image
When discovered by his wife, kissing the maid, Groucho said, I was just whispering in her mouth
Groucho Marx
Image
I can't understand why you don't get any mail from me. Perhaps it's because I haven't been writing
Groucho Marx
Image
Here's to our wives and girlfriends...may they never meet!
Groucho Marx
Image
If it gets any hotter in here I could use a big fan.
Groucho Marx
Image
I think that the Peeps or Peppies or Pipes diaries would be much more popular had there been a universal pronuncation of his name.
Groucho Marx
Image
Patience is the art of finding something else to do.
Groucho Marx
Image
Alimony is like buying hay for a dead horse.
Groucho Marx
Image
Even the intellectual crowd will have none of me. Physically, I look like one of them. Graying at the temples, I walk with a slight limp and wear thick glasses.
Groucho Marx
Image
The foods that are recommended today are as palatable as a steady diet of wet blotters.
Groucho Marx