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Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water!

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Water
Make
Onions
Ice
Inspiration
Eyes
Eye

More quotes by Groucho Marx

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Money cannot buy you happiness, and happiness cannot buy you money. That might be a wise crack, but I doubt it.
Groucho Marx
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I read in the newspapers they are going to have 30 minutes of intellectual stuff on television every Monday from 7:30 to 8. to educate America. They couldn't educate America if they started at 6:30.
Groucho Marx
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Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does.
Groucho Marx
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Three years ago I came to Florida without a nickel in my pocket. Now I've got a nickel in my pocket
Groucho Marx
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I don't have change I'd have to give you nine more books
Groucho Marx
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If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you.
Groucho Marx
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Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
Groucho Marx
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A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
Groucho Marx
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I am a man and you are a woman. I can't think of a better arrangement.
Groucho Marx
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The foods that are recommended today are as palatable as a steady diet of wet blotters.
Groucho Marx
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I think that the Peeps or Peppies or Pipes diaries would be much more popular had there been a universal pronuncation of his name.
Groucho Marx
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I've got the brain of a four year old. I'll bet he was glad to be rid of it.
Groucho Marx
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What have future generations ever done for us?
Groucho Marx
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There's one way to find out if a man is honest - ask him. If he says, 'Yes,' you know he is a crook.
Groucho Marx
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I've been looking for a girl like you - not you, but a girl like you.
Groucho Marx
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Hail, hail Freedonia, land of the free!
Groucho Marx
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Time wounds all heels.
Groucho Marx
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Women should be obscene, not heard.
Groucho Marx
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If income tax is the price you have to pay to keep the government on its feet, alimony is the price we have to pay for sweeping a woman off hers.
Groucho Marx
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Will you marry me? Do you have any money? Answer the second question first.
Groucho Marx